This is another old blog of mine. I had a lot but I only get to retrieve a few after I failed to back up my account in multiply.com which closed down with a short notice. Anyway, I realized how much I wrote about relationships in my younger years but I’m feeling such a novice now that I’m “older” with all my self-sabotage mistakes. I might put a Part 2 on this blog. Let’s see 🙂
(Understanding their Differences)
In the context of relationships between men and women, one can never really say that “He’s right. She’s wrong.” or the other way around coz’ oftentimes it’s just really plain differences.
Now in order to co-relate with each other peaceably, we must understand what these differences are.
1. Men are like shoe boxes while women are like handbags.
Men compartmentalize things. It’s like they have a box for work, for family, for sports, etc. They tackle one issue at a time. They are more logical because they are able to detach from their emotions which makes them better problem solvers.
If they’re having problems in the house, they don’t bring it to work while women tend to think more about it even while they’re working.
Just like handbags, women are filled with a variety of things. We’re kinda mixed-up which makes us more emotional. On a positive note, it gives us the ability to multitask like doing make-up while talking on the phone.
2. Men are like headliners while women are like fine prints.
Men tend to text, reply or talk so short because they simply want to get to the bottom line while women tend to enjoy the process of telling the story and sometimes to the extent of forgetting to mention the end of it. : )
For the women, sometimes short messages like “Ok” doesn’t necessarily mean that they are indeed okay. They just want men to dissect deeper. They just actually want a follow-up reply wherein they can splurge on the truth. This depends on the context, of course.
Women tend to think that men can read their minds while men tend to expect women to respond the way they respond.
3. Men are context-oriented while women are more subtext-oriented.
This is kinda related to number two for example when women ask men if they’re fat. It actually means that they want to be appreciated. Instinctively, men would either say yes or no but I guessed men nowadays have learned to kinda give an indirect answer like “You look nice.” 🙂
Another example of this is when men do something “nice” to women like maybe going out for lunch or inviting to a concert, women tend to look for the hidden meaning. The mind of women would quickly ask questions like why did he do this? Why at this hour? Is he always like this? Did he do it to me alone? even to the point of thinking Does he like me?. It’s either they do it because they have no companion or they have an extra ticket or simply because you’re friends, or maybe they are really interested in you and want to get to know you (Just to be fair to women).
This becomes an issue when women especially at this age are on the mode of “knowing who’s the one?” because there’s that tendency to always ask “Is he the one?” to every guy who does something nice to you FOREGOING the natural process of building friendship.
On the other side, men should be extra careful also. If the kind act becomes a regular gesture, it would really somehow be interpreted as a “signal” considering that women are always trying to decode things.
The safest mode should be NO EXPECTATIONS, NO ASSUMPTIONS. I guessed this goes for both men and women.
4. Men build friendships through shared experiences while women on shared emotions.
When men gather together, they tend to talk about their past experiences like how they used to bully around in school or about their embarrassing moments while women tend to talk about their crushes or their past relationships.
This is one of the reasons why women get so emotionally entangled when men start to open up their personal lives, their dreams and vision.
Men on the other hand tend to notice women when the women join them in their favorite pastimes or simply when the women get to hang-out with them.
Regardless of how men and women build, the key word here is FRIENDSHIP. When intentions are becoming questionable, FOCUS on what’s clear – FRIENDSHIP.
Conclusion:
There are more to say than these but if there’s one value we all need to have in order to relate well with each other, it’s ACCEPTANCE because at the end of the day it’s not a question of who’s right or wrong. It’s just PLAIN DIFFERENCES.
“Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God.”
*Inspired by the seminar “Hu u?:Understanding the Differences bet. Men and Women”
Leave a Reply